Reach Out

Yesterday as the news broke of the passing of Charlotte Dawson, I cried. I’ve actually never met her, but knowing that the killer that is depression had taken yet another life, provoked both anger and sadness in me.

In the past 24 hours, I’ve had not one, but multiple emails/messages from people who have met with depression. If they have depression, hearing this news has hit home. If they have had depression in the past, hearing this news has brought that dark wave back and they are reaching out to stop themselves drowning again.

Last year I wrote about my past battle with depression for the first time. It wasn’t planned, it was never something I wanted to make public. I write every now and then for CopingWithJane, and in an article I’d written, I’d merely mentioned it as a throw away line. Jane Copeland, the editor, had replied and instead of publishing that article, she’d asked if I could write about my journey with depression. I did, purely as an attempt to encourage those suffering that there is HOPE, and you CAN overcome this silent killer. I remember when she published the article, I didn’t post it on any of my social media. (she let me know recently the article has now had over 10,000 views).

I didn’t know how my friends would react. Would I get lectures about’why didn’t you reach out?’. It wasn’t as simple as that. I wanted to avoid the questions. I was aware of a few friends’ opinions on depression. I’d been a silent bystander as it was discussed. Things like ‘is it real?â’, ‘are these people just seeking attention?’, ‘people just need to get the focus off themselves’. I remember thinking, I will never give anyone reason to even question if I’m seeking attention. It nearly cost me my life.

My husband puts it like this: If your kidney breaks down, there is no stigma.
If you bone breaks, no stigma.
If your lungs shut down, no stigma.
But if your mind is diseased and breaks down – massive stigma and shame. It shouldn’t be like that.

There is a reason that media doesn’t use the word ‘suicide’. We hear it as ‘no suspicious circumstances’. There is always a spike in suicide rates once there has been a high profile suicide in the media. Why? It’s the ‘if they can do it so can I’ mentality. It’s real. People with depression are drowning and they just want to die. It’s a fight to stay alive. For me, many days it was a fight NOT to kill myself that day.

These people that have reached out to me over the past 24 hours are now fighting, to them i’m a ‘safe person’. I’m encouraging them. I’m praying for them. You can too. If you are reading this and hearing the news of the beloved Charlotte Dawson’s death has brought back this dark heaviness. I want you to know there is hope. There IS a way out, and it’s not death. You CAN get better. You CAN overcome and enjoy life again.

Make a call to one of the below numbers. Go and see your doctor TODAY. Make changes in your world. Schedule outdoor exercise every morning, even for 10 minutes. Write down daily positive affirmations and put them on your walls. Read them out each morning as you are getting ready for your day. Words are powerful. Speak positivity into your world. When the negative thoughts come make a conscious action to over-ride them and speak out a positive thought. When light enters, darkness has no choice but to flee. Keep fighting with all you have. You WILL overcome. If I can, you can too.